My Face? Absolutely Not!
I grew up near my maternal grandmother. She was remarkable, but one fear always haunted her.
It was not the ocean, beach, lake, or pond. She was terrified of bath water. She was a very clean and well-kept little somebody. Yet she could not—or would not—run more than a couple of inches of water in the bathtub.
Each time she did, there was a warning about the deadly effects of water and a deep sigh of relief when she emerged victorious after a bath and what, in her mind, was truly a close call with death.
Watching her made me determined not to let fear control me. However, overthinking still sneaks up on me sometimes.
Imagine my surprise when I was 1,000 miles away on vacation with my darling daughters and discovered a generational fear I thought was long gone pounding on the door of my ever-increasing, rapidly beating heart.
I was on a snorkeling excursion with my daughters. Panic set in. Breathing through your nose is hard for someone who talks a lot and usually breathes through her mouth.
My daughters were having the time of their lives without an ounce of fear. What was happening?
I’m the Momma Mia, the Marmee—the one who has taught her daughters to be strong little women. (A favorite reference because we love that movie.)
Yet there I was, turning red—something that usually only happens when I work out too long—and feeling incredibly embarrassed.
My heart said yes to getting everything on and eventually sitting on the steps of the ladder. My hands touched that water, and I said, “Absolutely not!” Suddenly, I sounded like my grandmother.
Where did that come from after all the traveling and adventures I have experienced? I had faced jungles in Africa, yet I was looking at that body of water in sheer terror.
Fear is real, and so is God. He sat there with me in that moment and calmed my breathing down. I didn’t need someone to hold my hand. He was already holding me.
I share this recent and profoundly humbling experience to make this point: It’s easy to get stuck in “if only” thinking—if only I had jumped off the diving board or put my face in the water to snorkel.
But we can choose a renewed mind. Right now, I can travel, cruise, and enjoy sailboat rides, as I have this past month.
Your fear may be different—spiders, food, failure, or loss. We all freeze sometimes.
Isaiah 43:2 says, “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.” Thank goodness.
That gives me courage to try new things and keep moving forward. Some days are more victorious than others.
Upstairs in the guest bathroom, there’s an oversized black tassel, a family photo, and a decorative box from my sister. Beside them sits a flat black object, about one inch by five inches in length. Can you guess what it is?
It’s a 3D cutout of the word courage; I placed it there as a reminder. My past doesn’t define me. It also reminds me that my strength comes from the Lord as I get my eyes off my circumstances and back onto Him. The same is true for you too, friend.
Let go of “if only” thoughts and focus on what you can do now. Thankfully, it’s because there’s strength in the name of the Lord.
The Call to Action:
Release past regrets. Set a 5-minute timer so you don’t get stuck thinking about the past. Release it, friend.
Then ask God to help you and give you the strength to act with courage today. Let me know what you do so I can celebrate with you! Let me know what you do so I can celebrate with you!
today’s radiant insight:
Being pure in heart means having the courage to see things the way He does.